Napping moms and questioning kids

Today I took a nap. Big surprise, right? Okay, actually it is. Last summer I had a sleep study done. They diagnosed mild apnea. I was fitted with a sleeping machine. I think it is called a C-PAP, but I didn't pay too much attention, I was too transfixed by all of the tattoos covering the technician. It was going to be just the two of us. All night long at the sleep center. He was creepy. His job was to watch me sleep.



I was asleep in about 5 minutes. I guess I wasn't too worried about creepy guy. Even if something happened, it was all being taped.



So anyway, now I feel great. I used to want to sleep all the time. Driving the kids to school in the morning was a real struggle. I was falling a sleep behind the wheel. I would come home a lot of days and think "I will just lay down for 1/2 an hour." I would wake up at noon. And I would feel like I had been run over by a Mack truck. And I would still be tired. I couldn't shake the sleepiness.

But not now. I rarely can even take a nap when I want to. No, I haven't turned into a massive never stop moving ,whirlwind of a super mom. I wish. They don't have a machine that you breathe into that gives you a new personality. If they did I would be buying one first thing in the morning! I do get more done, though. And I feel rested when I wake up. There are a lot of mornings that I wake up on my own. That was unheard of for the last few years.

Don't get me wrong. I still LOVE to sleep. I can still do 10 hours every night, no problem. But at least it is productive!

So back to today. I took a nap. A popular pastime at our house after church. What is it about taking a nap that makes your children have to come and ask you crazy questions. I was asked these things today while I was napping:

• Mom, is Dad home yet?

Let me think about this. You are out in the living room. I am asleep. Do I know if someone has come in and out? No. I am ASLEEP!

• Mom, can I knit my person a scarf for Christmas?

Hmmm... Okay, let me explain that one a bit. Our kids draw names and that is who they get a Christmas present for. Molly is very excited about doing this every year. Probably just because of her age. (6) Now, she has already been told that she can't spend any more money on her person since she has already spent about $25. I caught her trying to sneak out yesterday with her piggy bank to go to the pawn shop (I know, remember that I am married to a redneck. Some people like yard sales...) and buy more stuff. So now she can only make things. The girl does like to make crafts, but she doesn't know how to knit. Or crochet. Or tat. Or anything else like that. I tell her no in a groggy, I am trying to sleep kind of voice.

She leaves. She comes back. She tells me:

• But I found this sewing kit. Look mom.

She has one of those little 3 inch by 3 inch emergency sewing kits that come from the dollar store. What does the sewing kit have to do with a scarf? you guessed it. She was going to knit a scarf with the thread. Yes, she is still a little unclear on knitting. Maybe it is time to take her to a knitting class!

Even though that was a funny moment ,with Molly, my favorite question came later. I was sound asleep. Probably snoring. I snore without my sleep machine on since my airway is blocked. One of my sweet children came in and woke me up to ask:

• Mom? Are you sleeping?